My boyfriend and I have a great, easygoing relationship. He pranks me ALL THE TIME. His most common joke is hiding behind a door to jumpscare me. Just last week he snuck into the bathroom to surprise me when I'm showering. All good fun.

Three days ago, I decided to get him back. While he was sleeping, I grabbed the handcuffs we use for sexytimes and I cuffed him to the bed. He woke up right after with a huge smile on his face thinking we were gonna get naughty, he didn't expect me to take out a handsaw from the garage.

"Babe, watch this," I said.

I put the hacksaw right at my neck and started slashing away. So much blood poured out of me, you wouldn't believe. It splattered his face and he looked like he came straight out of a horror movie. I was having a hoot sawing my head off and he was just screaming and screaming. It took me a while, but when I was done I did a little dance while holding my head to try and calm him down. That was just one of our things, we liked to dance while joking around.

I think I danced for around 10 minutes with my holding head by the hair in one hand and the hacksaw in the other. He just screamed the entire time. I tried to tell him that I was okay, that this was just a joke or whatever, but nothing worked. He would NOT STOP screaming. Finally, I just put my head back and tried to kiss him. He pulled away really harshly and I have to admit it hurt a little.

That was three days ago. Since then he kept trying to make me let him go but I just can't. I love him too much. We're meant to be together, I know it. I've been taking care of him since then though, don't worry. I feed him nice treats, I clean him up when he "relieves" himself. I've done all these things but he still won't talk to me properly.

I know he'll lighten up eventually, but sometimes he calls me these hurtful names like "monster" or "demon" or whatever. It makes me think I did something wrong when all I've done is try and make him smile. So Reddit, am I the asshole?